people always say they "dream" about doing something to express a strong desire, or even a vizualisation. in that case, here are my most reccurent "dreams" :
fire. i am sitting on my school desk, sometimes with a cutter in hand, sometimes a stuffed bear; my school is burning on the background, nothing else is noticeable.
blood. i am naked, my long hair flowing on a pool of fresh, bloody corpses; i rub myself on them, in an almost self-pleasuring way.
television. i'm broadcasted in a very large outdoor screen. i am reciting a tirade, in some of the version this is taking place during a TV hijack. in a sort of new order fantasm, its very likely i point a gun at my temple and shoot myself in the head, hoping that my public suicide will create a moral panic.
